Worldly Chatter

I finally received some pictures of the wedding while we wait for the photographer to finish with the professional pictures. So since I have something to show you, I want to write about our big day and finally becoming a Mrs.!

It started a little after ten in the morning, a little late because we were waiting for some guests and taking pictures outside the town hall. It was a beautiful blue sky and everything finally fell into place except for me. I was a mess! I wanted to cry all morning, ok, actually I cried between 9 and  9:30 and tried to compose myself when my family, Duchies’ sister, the photographer and car showed up at 9:15-9:30. We drive to town hall in a blue Volkswagen Beetle, top down and the ride I am still trying to remember, I was so emotional! I was about to be married, I was beside myself with joy and excitement!

Our registrar, ambtenaar in Dutch, was wonderful from the beginning. She spoke to everyone in the room about how we met, she mentioned Duchies’ co-workers and all they did to make it possible for me to stay and even my own co-workers who attended and what that meant to us. She is a woman with a sense of humor yet very professional when she has to be. She was compassionate and even touched when both of our fathers walked us in the room. She had never had two fathers give two brides away before and was very moved when we walked in. She also read a poem for the occasion that I want to share. It is titled Ik heb je… by Jan-Simon Minkema.

Ik heb van jou wel duizend foto’s:
Ik heb je als je drinkt en eet,
Ik heb je als je staat te praten,
Ik heb je als je dat maar weet.

Ik heb van jou wel duizend beelden:
Ik heb je als een kind zo blij,
Ik heb je als een wijze meester,
Ik heb je als liefhebberij.

Ik heb van hou duizend gezichten,
Ik heb je als je met me vrijt,
Ik heb je als je ligt te slapen,
ik heb je voor de eeuwigheid.

Ik heb voor jou wel duizend zinnen:
Ik heb je lief, ik heb je beet,
Ik heb je door, ik heb je nodig
ik heb je als je dat maar weet…

I know there are many of you who cannot read this and for that I am sorry. I can read it yet some of it is not easily translated. I want to put it up there because it is beautiful and an important part of our ceremony. As she read it, I translated it as fast as I could, she was reading slowly but my brain needs time to translate here, there was but one word I missed but the rest I understood and loved it dearly. It made her smile when she asked if I understood. A lot of the ceremony was in English because of me and some of our guests, the only part mandated in Dutch so it was a wonderful touch to have something else in Dutch. After all, I live in Holland and my wife is Dutch so it was very appropriate and warming to hear.

We had our vows and the I Do’s and let me tell you I had tears! I don’t believe there was a dry eye in the room! First we had the Dutch part and both Dutchie and I said ‘Ja’ then Dutchie said her vows first and by the time I was done with mine, my knees felt weak! We put our wedding rings on each other and I should mention we do it different here. Our wedding rings go on our right ring finger, not the left. A tear or two fell down my cheeks when we did that! In Holland they have a trouwboekje, it’s our version of a marriage license. It translated to marriage book. First Dutchie and I signed the legal license, then my father and my sister-in-law, finally our registrar and a gentleman to notarize it all. She announced that we were married and we sealed it with a kiss! I had a lot of tears fall that morning! I like to think I can keep it all together and not show a lot of emotion but it all came out that day! I am a married woman! I, an American lesbian, am a married woman! I really never thought I would marry and here I am, Mrs. Joppe-Schmalfuss! I still can’t believe it!

I want to go on and on but I am getting all teary eyed again! I am someone’s wife! I am Dutchies’wife!

worldly chatter, A Dutch Wedding